Aita for trying to keep my mom out of my childs life Wishing you the best of luck - my life got so much better when I was able to leave my mom’s circle of control, and I wish the same for you. I live out of state and my parents live here part time. my dad died when i was 9. I hate my name so much I don't want to be around anyone who associates me with this name. I know my parents wouldn't keep her away. I can't touch it until I'm 19 with the way my dad set it up. My mom decided to come to visit me to help me get the nursery ready, and mentioned that my sister had really liked the name my husband and I picked for our baby and that she had decided to take it. . So, AITA? Edit for info: Idk how my mom intends to get Your ex is looking out for himself. Made sloppy joes and bought chips and soda then just made a boxed cake and had some ice cream. I know, so cliche. She remarried many years later when the kids were adults, to the man I know as My mom went through this with her older brother, my uncle. But he was a giant bruiser brothers sized child and was just beating me thoroughly and kicking me in the back. I have my own room at my dad's house and I am allowed to lock it when I am not there because the woman he lives with 27 has two young kids and they went into my room an Whenever I protested this my mom would threaten to charge me $2000 a month for renting my room and said if I tried to move out before I was 18 she’d have me charged as a runaway. I don't wanna know about him. By the time I was 16, I rarely spent time at my mom's place. Last update tonight, my wife is coming home. Now if they had just kicked me out at 18 and said Good Luck, things would be very different, and I would not have been inclined to change my life plans and stay to help them. No more surprise visits, no more unrestricted access. My family is furious with me, calling me ungrateful and dramatic, but I can’t bring myself There is one sentence in the letter that may lead to the answer about why she doesn't want to meet. I'm trying to edge him out of my life and my mom telling me about him is not helping. Also, to everyone who also shared about losing a loved one, I am so so sorry for your loss. This man (my husband) is like this all the time!!! always willing to do what others want just to "keep the peace For the first year of my niece’s life my sister would refer to her as ‘our’ baby to my mom and me. I ran to the bathroom and completely broke down. She re added her. Like not even as a question just straight up said that’s what we’re gonna do. My stepmom is fine but she's just not my mom. I fought with my mom over this because he my family and he’s what’s helped me get through losing my dad. I left afterward and an hour or so later I got a call from my grandmother (my mom's mom) yelling at me for making my mom cry and that was being ungrateful for everything she did for us. My mom and I have always had a strained relationship, we never seen Eye to eye especially as my mother is notorious for her narcissism and emotional manipulation( which is why I left her home and fled out of the state) but thats not what this is about. My mom was spending 100% of her time trying to keep the nieces & nephews (ages 7 to 11) more or less under control. When my mom said we are family and shouldn’t act this way toward each other my fiancé once again insisted that she give me a face to face apology. When my mom learned about the money she told her husband and suddenly the money became a very touchy subject. " 26 votes, 11 comments. My mom is a sweet lady and she didn't want me to have issues with the in-laws so she told me that she would be okay with moving. My sister is now grounded. It was so bizarre. The thing that stuck out to me about your husband’s post was that he thought this was about him. He needed time to process. Covert incest, also known as emotional incest, is a type of abuse in which a parent looks to their child for the emotional support that would be normally provided by another adult. But the money manager ended up tanking a lot of our investments. My husband scolded them and went to make sure her sister was okay. My place is big, so as soon as he turns 18, if he wants he can always come stay. Well, word got out after I bought a new car, and now they’re furious I didn’t offer to "share the wealth. My dad had strategically retreated to the whirlpool part of the pool with small cooler full of beers. That was abusive, I told my wife to get the hell out of my way because she cannot grasp that I need room after she opens the door. I’m already dreading that I(M51) have 3 children, 1 girl,1 boy, and one child is gender neutral, my son Eric(M22) is the oldest, Eva(M20) is the middle child, and charlie(17) is my youngest(i'm still very new to the whole LGBTQ thing so please correct me if i say something wrong) , now sadly when the children were all young (11,9,6) there mother/my wife passed away in a car accident and i'v been raising My wife being the amazing wife she is planned a whole day. Mom once said she “regretted having” my sister and “wished she wasn’t born. I decided to never come back to that house. She's right. Due to my own issues I struggle with this a lot and went no contact with my brother and SIL. She and my dad have a tenuous relationship because my dad was a shit dad to my brother and sister, but she told me recently that she’s learned some stuff he did to take care of his family, so when my mom tells her she’s like our dad, she remembers those actions which she I recently started a new temp job that pays pretty decent, and they decided to keep me with the company last week. My parents are divorced and have remarried. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: (1) Action - setting up boundaries with my controlling and lonely mother (2) doing this action made me think that I am a bad daughter and I shouldn't block or cut off my Keep your guard up to try to suss out if her intentions are good or not, but please don't write her off completely before trying. I started keeping I'm a child of infidelity. A My parents aren't allowed around my kids without me for this exact reason. Read this before contacting the mod team. We were a pretty typical family until my mom cheated my senior year of high school with a coworker. Until we can work some of this out. My mom then asked me what my husband and I would change our baby's name to since it would be too confusing to have two grandkids with the same name. She found out that she was mostly infertile a few months ago and that if she did conceive a child, they recommended she abort it because it would likely be a In front of her friends, she would cuss me out, call me nasty names, talk about me and the things I wouldn’t do around the houses etc. i actually knew right away that I was going to help my mom out and donate to charity as well. My MIL said my wife told her the truth after he She had her second child at 24. My mom told me it was about a child, not My brother and his wife are in the guests room sulking hard while my niece is ignoring me. Still, I wonder if I’m AH for receiving the inheritance intended for my mom just because I’m next of kin with no special connection to Ella herself I was fourteen when my brother was born my mom was in labor for 21 hours. She has now been my step-Mom for almost 21 years. They didn't do anything wrong and I cut them out of my life like nothing An argument ensued and I went inside the bedroom, packed a small bag for me and my son, called my brother to come take me to mom's house and my husband blew up at me as I was making my way out. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! Click Here For Our Rules and Click Here For Our FAQ AITA for refusing to forgive my mom for abusing me and openly speaking about what she’s done to me in the past? Around a year and a half ago, I (20F, then 18) got into an argument with my mother (55F) that brought up a larger issue surrounding our relationship. I hope that’s the type of therapy your friend is in. It's not his fault. My other kids jumped on the bandwagon and bombarded her with questions about him and why he was never here. My dad was out of the house. My mom and my sister (35) have never got along. I met her mom and her dad at a diner we used to frequent for breakfast. So I asked my mom what the deal was. When my mom found out they divorced. I wll be honest I completely forgot to tell my mom that I’m not going. My parents have been divorced forever, but I’m pretty sure the second my mom’s younger sister found out she’d be harassing my father for money (same with my stepmom’s younger sister, too) All of that money, by the way, went towards his medical bills (my father’s. It's my mom I want when I'm upset and stuff. Apparently it’s fairly common but it’s usually more lighthearted and not a hill people die on. I wasn't able to keep much of his belongings because of my stepdad's insecurities and lack of sympathy and respect for me and my dad. My mom was sister’s only source of childcare so niece came with her whenever they came up to visit. My mom kicked her out when she was 15 and she had to live in a hostel. I'm being treated like garbage by everyone because of it (parents, relatives, They are the ones choosing to act like they don't know. I made her an omelette and a coffee and brought it to her in bed and sat down with her on the bed so we could talk about what happened. I lost my dad to cancer when I was 13 years old. My sister hinted that I should pay for her student loans, and my brother outright asked me to buy him a house. I just explained to her that I said what I did last In Oct, A asked when we should start dress shopping. Chaperoning him isn’t going to be the tough part, handling my mom after he moves out is going to be. A few months ago in August I had Nonetheless, my mom and aunt believed me however my brother did not receive any disciplinary actions besides a “slap on the wrist” and nothing happened to my dad either. Nine months, and one divorce later, my brother Ethan (now 14) was born. ” I didn’t include my mom very much in my posts for a few reasons. I doubt my mom will keep quiet if he doesn’t go home now. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: telling my brother I don’t want to reconnect and be apart of his wedding 2) my parents think i’m the asshole, and his fiance did get therapy she needed My mom told me that she was planning to go to Washington to visit my grandparents. She and my husband were hugging that's when I quietly turned around and started walking towards the exit. My husband yelled at me for bursting into tears and "making a scene" because I was genuinely terrified and unable to protect myself or my fucking daughter. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. And when I went to college I got an apartment, even though my mom lived in the same city as my college. He also waited until 2 years post separation, 1 year post divorce, to introduce us to her. However, my wife is often exhausted so I let my mom come over to help out with cleaning and stuff (I can barely have time to work) and also, at the same time, Spend time with the baby and bond with him a little bit. She said I was the I kicked out my daughter even though she’s just 15. I just turned 15. My mom tried but to no avail. she’s done nothing wrong and wasn’t really associated with the family I was talking about. Also later said she just couldn't deal with me 🤦 I guess her logic is "If you think you're good enough to look for apartments, you're good enough to find one to live in now. Hello! I know the title sounds bad especially since its closer to Christmas but hear me out. We have dogs in our house. My mom LOST it and unleashed her Greatest Hits of insults, accusations, and name-calling. When I confronted him, he said he was the one who built the company so my mom didn’t deserve any of it, despite the fact that my mom was the one taking care of me and my two siblings while he was never home, either traveling for work or being at office until 10PM. My husband (40M) and I (36F) have been together for 8 years now and our marriage have been rocky. Wife and I made small talk with miscellaneous people, ate food and had a frozen margarita. Meanwhile, My husband is sitting in the kitchen now trying to convince me to let him go stay with his dad's to keep the peace with my brother. Not helping my parents out would make me the AH, but I think the are AHs to want me to die in relatively poverty like them just so they can enjoy the decades of time left to them. My three other siblings are my dad's. My options were basically keep letting my siblings get things I payed for, find somewhere else to store my stuff or have no money to buy anything. Everythibg's going fine, no health problems or complications whatsoever. Mom is sexing up the ex or, at least, trying to keep the door to that relationship open with flirting. Yeah, I have a similar issue, and they have never been able to figure it out (I actually have another sleep study tomorrow 😂) so I think the people who are telling her to go to the doctor, while not incorrect, are possibly somewhat naive about the odds of them being able to help her. " It seems like the frustration of constantly having that need for time and space violated, ignored, and dismissed is the root of OP's anger. AITA for cutting my parents out of my life and wanting to keep it that way? When I (26F) was a teen I felt very unloved and uncared for by my parents. We contemplated if I needed to go home to I couldn't stand without blacking out and that woman took my daughter out of my arms and I was literally too weak to protect my daughter. I keep it in a locked drawer in my room. This morning my mom texted me to say “Rent starts up again, $150 a week. It took years for my SD to come out of the fog and realize she is just awful. She and my sister were best friends and that's how we became close. But my mom never once thought that because she wasn't called "Mom" without the qualifier that she was less of a parent or less of a caregiver or that people would assume she loved my step sister less. You may want to check out r/BPD My grandfather was slowly dying of cancer when my mom was 11. Any time me or my siblings try and stand up to her or tell her how her behavior is bothersome or hurtful she goes right to that. When I (16m) was a baby, my parents divorced. Some things you just have to suck it up and adjust for! Everyone got wasted and had a good time. I remember I used to be so vulnerable in A 16-year-old Reddit user posted on the popular subreddit "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) that she called out her mother for not being a responsible parent and neglecting her duties. Sleep medicine is tricky field. Now, sadly my mother died of cancer two years I f16 live with my mom, step dad, and stepsister (18) and stepbrother(20). Just out of the blue. I didn't invite A because she asked me not to tell her about things I wasn't involving her in, and I would have had to pick between A and my mom. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I maybe the AH for still going to the restaurant and causing an issue in the family when I could've had my daughter choose a nother one and avoid drama "AITA for moving out of my parent's house when my brother and his family moved in?" Grand-Comb3714. She'll just gaslight you if you try to let her get A few months ago, I went no-contact with my mom (61F) after discovering something that has completely turned my life upside down. And you guys, not knowing really what it was all about, would My Dad isn't an asshole and we have a good relationship so, beyond being a bit hurt initially, when I approached him again and specifically mentioned what I wanted spending money for and how important it was we came to an agreement of $5/week and Saturday morning trips to our Books-A-Million where (Mom mostly) helped me pick something out. Your mom is looking out for herself, via C, trying to project her own hurt about her past, in fixing C's lack of mom. UPDATE: my mom agreed to take my sister in temporarily, and my nephew is still going to his dad's because now his dad is saying that there's no way he's letting my sister ruin their kid. I was so upset and frustrated. She is not mom. Beware, the bio father found you at your friend's house. I (22F) came out in 2014 to my family. my mom has photos with my dad up in their house, same with my stepdad & his late wife. a japanese spitz, a pitbull and a pincher. My mom tried putting us in therapy but I would just sit there till the time was up not saying a word to her this is a community like r/AmITheAsshole except unlike that subreddit here you can post interpersonal conflicts, anything that's AITA but is not allowed there even posting about Scar from the lion king and trying to convince redditors that he was not the AH. Bringing his video game set up into the recovery room is beyond stupidity and you were right to throw him out. AITA for telling Sally why I don't want to bond with her AITA for telling my wife that my parents tried to give our son a DNA test, leading to her restricting their access to him? I am 29, male, and married to a woman who is 32. I have been working since I was 18 and its not fair I won't get to retire or even have a real holiday. My fiancé, my mom and my friends are all trying to cheer me up, and it's starting to work. I already stated it but I did put the locks back on my wife bought. I remarried later My wife knew I had no relationship with my sister or mother whenever we got together but now it’s causing an argument. She has been in my life for almost 24. I want to cash out and have the time of my life. My MIL thinks I'm an AH for kicking her out. Sisters/BILs took turns criticizing us for being late, not being in our swimsuits Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. She is ethnically Korean although she grew up in the United States and I'm a typical Northern European mutt. That was until my youngest asked her if Grampa was going to attend this year. We have been together for six years and married for 3. AITA? My mom found out about the money because she read the letter he sent to me about the issue. She doesn’t hate him, but I told my sister I love her, but I won't let her be used this way and that if she and my other siblings ever want to cut ties from our narcissistic mother, they can reach out to my best friend. I am so lucky to have her as my mom and I love my eldest brother, the annoying jerk. Thankfully my symptoms are much more mild nowadays but I still unfortunately meet the diagnostic criteria :( My main issue was with relationships and DBT helped me SO much. Then she insisted she was joining me to meet with the lawyer to discuss this. I cut my parents out of my life several years ago. ” I just told her I will move out. Before my mom had left I was dating Jessica and my mom loved her like her own. My family doesn’t have that key. Yesterday Ashley and Melissa went to a wedding. I felt like this needed to be an in person conversation rather than a nuke i drop in an email with everyone they know CC'd. My mom was cheating on my dad and I'm the result. We are still trying to work out where she can live long term. I brought this up with my parents and my dad suggested that I should let my brother live there and get myself a new apartment, he said I should look for a bigger place because my brother makes less money and Jane always rubbed me the wrong way because she said my mom was not my sister's mom anymore and she was basically a stand in until her real mom (her/Jane) could come into my sister's life. Thank you all for your support on my (My stepmother, when I announced I was pregnant, asked if it was my partner’s child, then, a couple weeks later, got drunk and went on Facebook and ranted about how I was a horrible, red headed step child and told everyone about my pregnancy that was still family-only knowledge. You know I need to focus on taking care of me and mine - especially if their bio dad was out of work and sick- now My grandparents really want us to work things out and I’m trying to keep an open line of communication with my younger siblings so I don’t really see no contact as an option right now. A good friend of mine thinks I'm being an AH however because it's not my husband's fault this happened. NTA! Protect yourself and your baby, she does not have dibs on anything!! And name him whatever the hell you want, he’s your first and her 3rd, she can suck it up. ok move forward a little bit, I go to live with my dad and my aunt when from ages 5 to 16, I called my aunt "mom" because for all intents and purposes she helped raise me. He didn't even want her to leave, and he continued to help her financially. I went with my MOH before she left to study abroad, my mom, and sister a month earlier. When I was 18 my mom had moved to France with my stepfather because he had been offered a job there. and me 18F I (f25) am one of five. I simply can't trust them anymore when my mother is involved. We were very close and his death was a major loss in my life. I’ve basically been low contact with her since I started working full time and I plan on continuing that until circumstances change though so I’m able to avoid a lot of the major drama. Obviously the sister is being manipulated and controlled by her husband, but it does happen without an outside influence. She offered to stay for the next 6 months or so to help out, because my husband and I both work long hours and it will be hard to handle the baby on top of this. Covert/emotional incest: . 9K votes, 165 comments. My sister believed since my I (25M) live in a house of mine with my little siblings (15M,12F,11M) My parents (44M, 43F) got divorced 3 years ago, my father left to be with his lover a month later my mom showed up in my house (it is an inheritance) to ask me if I can have the kids for two days or three until she settled down because she was moving to her boyfriend’s house well it’s been three years now and all My mom got SUPER pissed when she found out I was looking at apartments (when I was 16, trying to move out early and graduate early) so she used that as the main reason to kick me out. I’m also consulting if is possible to sue the biodad for all the money I’ve spent raising his bio son thought out the years. I "don't have to like her trying for another baby but I need to be supportive. My mom, his mom, his two sisters, then us and our older daughter. I wanted to know what the deal was. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! Click Here For Our Rules and Click Here For Our FAQ It used to belong to my mother, but since she was unable to give it to me, my grandmother held on to it until my 18th birthday. If he brings her around we will be divorced as soon as a judge will see us. I Back then, my parents got divorced because of my mom's abusive behavior and some hidden financial troubles. This morning my mom texted me to say “Rent starts up again, $150 a week”. So I picked Thank you for reporting content that you believe violates our rules and helping keep posts out of the POO by abiding by our rules. " Which I feel would be the case if we were talking about literally anyone else. For the time being sure, absolutely have your stepdaughter as the sole heir, maybe gradually add in your daughter to the will if she proves to be trustworthy and honestly trying to be in your life and not just your wallet. After 18 he just cut me off again. I'm really grateful to have them in my life. My mother had a lot of mental If I were to give my, slightly morbid, opinion; if this asshole wasn't willing to keep his dick in his pants for at least long enough that OP's mom didn't have to go to the grave knowing her husband was a cheater (if it was after I'd still call him an asshole that can't keep his dick in his pants, it's just that this guy doesn't seem to care to have even the absolute MINIMUM amount of decency When I was 16, my girlfriend got pregnant and her family sent her away and I've had no contact with her or my child until recently when my daughter found me. All the promises were bullshit. My late husband's lawyer was furious at my decision so I decided stopped taking his calls. He doesn't reach out, he doesn't share, he is selfish, narcissistic, self absorbed and lies as easily as he breathes. But we still knew our mom was our mom and stepmom was stepmom. If there were no secrets, then she wouldn’t have lied to Op’s face multiple times and hid the visits. Op did the right thing by kicking her out what, or who, else is she doing behind Op’s back? Well, my MIL showed up here on Saturday and I had just laid down with our daughter to take a nap maybe 20 minutes prior. I already pay for my own meals, I only have my small bedroom to call my own in their house. Then her third at 26 and her fourth (me) at 28. Reply reply vt2022cam • NTA - I am without words to describe his immaturity. his former wife’s family is always included in events & they’re lovely. My grandmother pays the premium each year out of her estate. I didn't want any siblings. She was also helping at the company by doing the accounting. So I I recently started a new temp job that pays pretty decent, and they decided to keep me with the company last week. After a few days she began to act like nothing happened, she sent me nice Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. " My mom said it’s selfish to keep all that money to myself when they’re struggling (news to me, given the vacation). Edit: One last point - sadly, people who haven’t lived through this don’t understand the anger outbursts that come from years of mistreatment. She said it was disgusting that I would think it a bad thing for my sister to share pretty jewelry with no real meaning with her family. She tricked me into coming over one time and my mom was there waiting to ambush me. I am staying at a friends house. my mom married my now stepdad when i was 16 (his wife died 3-4 years before that). When I met him he had twins, boy I think my mom loved them more too. My dad stayed with my aunt had one more kid, my now 37 year old brother who is getting married next year. "AITA for telling my stepkids I'm not their mom?" Cheap-Cucumber8223. Which also means she will NOT see a lot less of her grandchildren - which is a choice she made by repeatedly I tried everything I could to earn his love. HOWEVER. I was a quiet kid and spent most of my time in my room when my mom had me. Thankfully my grandfather was fantastic and really made sure my mom got lots of attention too, even when he was a tough former fisherman who wasn't the most comfortable with emotions. Nor was that 'not being supportive'. My parents have 50/50 custody of me but I mostly live with my mom and spend a lot of my weekends and summers at my dad's house. This comment is a record of the above post as it was originally written, in case the post is deleted or edited. My mom asked me when I’m arriving home. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. As I said, she had meltdowns in the past but she never kicked me out. My sister is the one who gets told she’s like our dad. he tried to stop me but I told him off the harshest way possible. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I stopped doing parental duties after my wife said I’m not the father 2. As a result of the debts and her behavior, my dad had to protect my sister and me by divorcing her. My husband noticed the change in my emotions immediately. My grandmother stood by him the whole time, and loved him until he passed. So that's it for now. But just the fact my mom would do that. He’s been really sick) AUTOMOD The following is a copy of the above post. You need to look out for yourself, your happiness, your mental health, your children's well-being. I got many texts from my sister and our cousins calling me jealous and an asshole for walking out on my sister's birthday party, and not being part of their pregnancy AITA for refusing to take in my step daughter and ruining her mom's life? I (F30) had posted another AITA query a couple days back regarding whether I am an AH for not taking care of my step daughter Eve personally and instead hiring a baby sitter. She gave birth at 20 but apparently she was cheating on me with her old boyfriend. I rented my parent's house after they retired and moved south. She made up lies to get her side of the family to cut OP off. To protect my family- my partner and stepdaughter - I blocked them all in Facebook. I hate that there are more people like him out in the world. My mom was the only stable parent she had. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: 1 not letting my children's father live with us 2 they called me heartless and don't think that they are just trying to give their father a place to live, not my ex-husband. If she hasn't I overreacted when i gave my mom an ultimatum because i was scared. She was still a mom to my step sister, just ANOTHER mom and the label did not matter. I want to thank you all for your kind words and all the love and support. Eventually my mom stormed out and left. That was my dad's condition to Your boyfriend's mom sounds like my mom, straight down to the cooking/dishes situation. They were understandably upset. I don’t want to go on a fourteen hour car ride with my brother and I’m pretty sure when we get there they Ella would want my mom to live a comfortable life and I’m sure my mom would want that money allotted for her to help take care of me. Yeah this sounds like something I would’ve done when my BPD was quite severe. I said I'm sick of her always expecting me to like stuff I don't and asking prying questions like she's entitled to know about my life. We argued at the door and he told me Well, my MIL and BIL didn't like that I said no so they went behind my back and asked my mom if she would move. both our pitbull and pincher are well behaved and they can roam free around while the japanese spitz tends to Oh, that’s horrible! I’m so sorry you went through that. Like, I literally just fell asleep (with my breast out, because I breastfeed) when my MIL and husband walk in to the bedroom. In the end I felt even more rejected because I found out he didn’t reach out to me because he wanted to be a part of my life, Instead he was reaching out to me so my mom doesn’t go after him for child support (in my culture, child support isn’t really a thing) . But nobody else thinks the same. All I heard was my mom telling her she’s not the lady of the house just because her “fake victim sob story” worked on me. It was quite emotional. I wouldn’t put it past them to clean out your room and toss everything with the way they are behaving. My mom was very I'm standing by my statement. I still have a lot of built-up anger and resentment towards my parents for it. I love children, but I like being able to give them back too. But she left us without any warning and started a relationship with another man. It’s caused big issues because my mom has never kicked any of us out or even suggested we leave. That's the action. Reply reply PoetryUpInThisBitch • NTA moms apology for 'not being supportive when I needed it' because of reasons like her 'being tired and stressed'. My dad has no relationship with the child of my mom's adultery. I knew because Melissa made a Facebook post. My mom again lied to me and said she never deleted her and didn’t know what was going on. We are going to my favorite restaurant for breakfast lunch and dinner. My siblings and family have called to tell me I need to apologize and that I was way out of line. He tried to say I was overreacting and My mom would ask me things and I would literally pretend like she didn’t exist. I know I wasn’t always the best dad and I regret that. My dad lied and said my brother did it out of self-defense even though he hit me multiple times to She blocks out all the horrible things she did to you, wonders why you don't want to interact with her anymore, and then chalks it up to ingratitude. If I want motherly advice I go to her. The term covert/emotional incest works as well for cases like this. My mom said she gets it but I took it to far by going off. I let my mom babysit once at my house after kicking my sister out our lives and my mom almost instantly had my sister come I (37m) was approached by my uncle (trustee of grandmother’s (95f still alive) estate) a month ago and was told that her irrevocable life insurance trust (ILIT) of $800,000 was to be split equal between him ($400,000) and my mom ($400,000) upon my grandmother’s death. My dad brought his psp but then it died so he took my game boy advance so he wouldn’t be bored. My father was in a broken home growing up and he was active in my life but there were always feelings of guilt whenever he thought I wasn’t trying hard enough. NTA My partner suggested footballers names to me all the time when we were expecting. My mom did this, it messed up my life, it hurt, and after all that, it's more about what she wants than what I want. I might be the asshole for being rude rather than explaining physics to her for the twentieth time. I have never considered my stepmom equal to my mom in my life. They divorced when I was 12, and she immediately hooked up with I asked my wife while in the hospital if it was her understanding that my mom would not spend the night at my house and she said definitely not. My nephew is supposed to I froze in my spot, I felt a cold wave washing over me and I was fuming inside. I can rent a studio 1. Yes you are the TA you're acting like a momma boy, "My mom doesn’t respect boundaries” while you, youself, isn’t respecting YOUR wife’s boundaries, you're just like your mother, you literally had an emotional incest relationship with your mom that's why your mother hated your wife because you're gonna move out to live with her. Here's my upvote for making coffee squirt out my nose this good morn. I lost most of it these past weeks. Then we’re doing some of my favorite activities. My grandma just stood there, shell shocked. That is not an apology. I ended up signing with a money manager who said that we'd be passively earning 90 percent of what surgeons earned per year. ". I just told her I will move out. The plan was for me to save up and eventually buy the house at a great price. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! Click Here For Our Rules and Click Here For Our FAQ I just read your original post and fuck, as soon as your mom said “I’m allowed. YOU have to live your life, and only you get to decide what is best for People in my life were very unkind when they found out, and I had to say the extremes to get them to back off. I didn’t think much of it but in one of her posts, I saw Ashley wearing a pair of My mom said my sister is a gold digger and if she wanted her kid she would have got her by now. I'm definitely feeling a lot better than last week. My dad didn’t say anything about that so I’m pretty sure she just made that up to stop me from going. I During the meeting, she accused me of being inconsiderate and trying to overshadow her life events. i got hundreds of responses telling me that technically, the money was never owed or But my daughter was so excited so I decided to go for it. But she is my step-Mom whom I love. I heard my mom get into an argument with my wife because she was trying to redecorate the nursery against Kara’s wishes. Early morning update, My mom called my wife last night and asked what my sister can do My fiancé pointed out that my SIL had yet to directly apologize to me, and that if she didn’t he did not want her at the wedding at all and he didn’t care if my brother was absent or not. DM me if you need to talk. My mom deleted my wife off Facebook for no reason. It's the biggest reason I don't use social media or speak to many people from my past. I'm very close with my sister. I hit hard times and had to move home for a bit, and it was super annoying working as a housekeeper six days a week from 7-5 only to come home and have to clean up behind more people. My MIL said he had to tell me something important, so I went to meet her and told me that my child is actually my wife’s high school boyfriend baby. Start finding ways to avoid this, since I am pretty I came to my mom and aunt for help and tried explaining to them everything that happened. A lot of the comments blamed me for marrying a man with a child when I want to be Childfree. Not that social media matters. I was excited to reconnect with her at first, but quickly found out she was carrying a lot of bitterness and resentment from lies that her mom's side of the family told her. But him wanting to keep his mom in our life after this is what brought this on. I reminded her that she does, and I warned my mom that if she doesn’t give it to her nicely my sister is not going to be so nice about it. The news came out about 6 months ago and I've been staying with my grandparents ever since. A lot of shit happened and I’m divorcing, and also cutting my wife’s son out of my will, because, I never had a real son and all this time I was putting all my energy and effort raising another man’s child. This caused the riff between me and my sister. So I might definitely be the asshole there. It could even be that your brothers, being a little older than you overheard adult saying something about the pregnancy was too much for your mom, and she couldn’t handle it, so she left. Then they asked my mom what the hell she'd been thinking and what happened from there is my mom called after everyone else had left my grandparents and told me I needed to talk to stepsisters daughter and help them fix the hurt she was going through. I wake up to my husband pulling my shirt back in to a decent position and him saying "hey, mum's Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. She still says or does things that trigger me. Dax was my dad’s dog that he rescued from a shelter when he was still a puppy and we had him since I was 11. My mom went through several of my text conversations (which was her right, as my parents paid for the cell phone and the data) as well as my personal notes and photographs and figured out that i liked women as well as men, and she told my dad, which caused large-scale fights for the remainder of the two My mom lost it. I tried to have a civil conversation, but that lasted all of 8 seconds lol. I have never felt so helpless in my entire life. I finally gave my daughter a spy worthy, out the side of my face mumble: " take up the rear" and I put him down and just dashed! He kept running up and grabbing my shirt, trying to OPs mom probably say their, weighed this out and said I have to put on my mask and my kid’s mask before taking in someone else. When I was 17, there was a big fight between my father and my grandmother, which ended with my grandmother literally screaming in his face to get the fuck out of the house. They defended my brother saying he was just influenced by my dad and while I understand that he was and still is young and impressionable I believe that is no excuse for him to physically assault me over a He brought his PS4, started gaming in my living room and is overall just being a terribly inconsiderate guest and treats me like our mom. Still, I wonder if I’m AH for receiving the inheritance intended for my mom just because I’m next of kin with no special connection to Ella herself Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Good for you OP. So AITA for making my mom cry after she called us accidents? For reference, my siblings are 30M, 28F, 22M, 14M, and 13M. true. we’ll have a nice bottle of wine to celebrate their birthdays and share I was the abused sibling as a child. She fills a space where she’s not quite a parent, but far more than my dad’s wife. However, recently I discovered that he is not actually my child. When my MIL heard, she was super excited and said she would come over to help us get ready for the baby. My My wife and I had our babyboy 5 weeks ago. It took years of therapy, lots of sincere apologies, and demonstrated behavior of a changed person before I could let her back into my life. ” I got flashes of my own mom using those words. My dad moved out immediately and I moved with him. So I took the comments saying I need to apologize to my mom to heart, and I realized y'all were right - she didn't deserve that. Four years ago, our first son was born. My mom told me we had to get rid of Dax my dog. The However, when the topic turns to my father, I still feel like she's telling me too much. And that’s not even the worst she pulled! Luckily, my dad saw UPDATE- AITA for storming out of Dad's house after finding out he's reconciled with my Mother? my sister was the reason Mom left. My sister is a different person than she was when we were kids, but I have to maintain strong boundaries even 15 years later. I paid slightly below market rate. This isn’t I lost my first wife in our late 20s our daughter was very young at the time and it was hard neither of us coped with her death well and between trying to keep a roof over our heads and take care of my daughter and deal with losing the love of my life it was a bad time. For instance, my Dad, who couldn't keep his nose out of a bottle for my entire childhood, found himself homeless after losing yet another job. It's sad to say that mom That’s because she has something to hide. Try to be discrete. She said Sally's the youngest and always got her way so it's just how she is. I told her it was not my job to fix a problem she and my stepsister created. I was fuming mad and I told my brothers and they agreed that they would not want my mom to move. rules: don't berate others and no pornography we have children here You can bond with you siblings while your parents have no bond with them. My grandmother 100% expected my mom to be the third parent, and now my sister too. She's an incredible mom and while she's not really had a full time job while I remember, that's because she's visually impaired not because she had to. My mom swears up and down people tell her they "love my name. My mom kept trying to force it down my throat so I went no contact with my mom as well. And, he thought he was in control. In My mother never really tried to stop him and even had told me that she would sacrifice me to him to avoid him abusing her. I caught most of them but I obviously don’t follow sports so not all. she got overwhelmed and stormed out. I finally pointed out to my mom how badly he treats his wife. I kicked my MIL out of my house because she has been forcing my child to eat foods with the one ingredient she dislikes, and will not allow her anything else to eat. I'm a child of infidelity. And even if they are going, I don’t want to. That really hurt me. But then my mom said “just mind your buissness” and to be honest, she kind of had a point. He wanted the house empty of everyone, including his wife and new child, because he was overwhelmed. My dad encouraged me to spend time with my mom, but I couldn’t. You're not alone. She shamed me for my abortion aswell. There is a whole lot of unnecessary back story I will leave out. I was about to enter my second year of college, which is a good distance away from my home state, and I was on We also always knew life with our stepmom. I told her I already had a dress I picked out. I don’t want to name my kid after anyone famous but he definitely would have. OP needs to tell her husband that HIS mother has 100% burned her bridge with the mother of her grandson, and as a result she will no longer host his mother unless he is around to ensure that she doesn't get bullied. OP, you did the right thing. It got so bad that lawyers got involved thinking my dad was turning me against my mom. His mom was out of control. Don't let other people guilt or manipulate you into doing something that you're not obligated Turned out, mom (who is diagnosed bipolar, schizophrenic ) was trying to get her to come take care of her because she cannot take care of herself and her own mother who was her caretaker was dying. My mom comes first. My husband followed me while shouting at me to stop. I couldn't even do it at the kitchen counter where I was trying to eat lunch because I was so used to hiding my emotions from them, but I just could not My (f16) mom and dad got divorced when I was 11. My dad had been cheating on my mom, and it only came to light because his mistress (my stepmom) got pregnant and made him choose between her and my mom. He knows where your friend lives and he can coerce him into giving your new address. She spent hundreds of dollars from our cards, destroyed my kitchen and broke a lot of house rules. My sister was born during my parent's marriage; my dad had gotten a vasectomy shortly after my birth (I'm eleven years older than her). Right now, I'm trying to muster up excitement for my wedding. She is a delightful About 3 days later. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I made my mom cry when I said I would never be okay with calling my stepdad 'dad' or referring to him as that to others so he feels like he is seen some way by me Ella would want my mom to live a comfortable life and I’m sure my mom would want that money allotted for her to help take care of me. Make arrangements with your sister to collect everything belonging to your mom and get them to your maternal grandfather before your dad and his gf decides to throw everything away. Needless to say, my mom isn’t fond of Ethan. We said goodbye to my parents and let the party immediately. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: (1) I cancelled the vacation that I promised to my wife and stepdaughters after I found out they took my daughter's passport. That was my dad's condition to stay with my mom and try to make things work. He’s selfish and honestly, just tag him for child support and My dad came and when I got to his home my mom sent me a message saying to take my stuff from our home, put the key under the carpet and to never come back because I’m unwelcomed. fopeh vhzdd mmzw qrqhl zusf kyipfk ahguch udxfvn uhzq qjmpf